Getting annoyed is a very common thing for us. We get annoyed a lot by the driver that is honking on his horn repeatedly, by the regular check of bags at offices, by the words of people around us. It is an unpleasant feeling. We really don’t want to be annoyed but can’t really help it. What irks you, you can’t shirk it. That is the problem of life. It irritates you. It distracts you from the merry line-of-thinking you were having just now. It leads to you being angry and frustrated.
Here are some ways in which you can come back to the CHILL state from an annoyed state:
- Identify what is bothering you:
Whenever you feel annoyed, it is important to not lash out and rather introspect as to what bothered us in the first place. It has a two-pronged benefit, it stops you from lashing out and second, it lets you explore yourself and know yourself better.
Know thyself and thou shall conquer the world.
2. Create a self-advice:
It mostly happens that we are very good at giving others advice rather than applying it for our own when time comes. It has a reason though.
When you are listening to the other person, you are not invested in that in anyway and thus are able to give rational advice to the person in the situation. Emotions cloud rationality and give way to stupid actions. So, when you are annoyed, try to create a self-advice that will stop you from doing anything stupid.
3. The source can be hidden in plain sight:
Maybe the real reason you are annoyed is because you identify with a certain aspect of a person that is similar to you and you hate that part of yourself.
Maybe the person who is supposedly annoying not the culprit but the culprit is hidden in plain sight, just look at the mirror and you will find him.
We all indulge in self-hatred. We can’t really love all of us. Sometimes our certain actions are in scrutiny by ourselves only. They maybe socially acceptable, endearing even to others but we may hate them.
So, maybe the real reason we are annoyed is not that person but our own inability to accept ourselves.
4. Be compassionate:
The person who is annoying may not know that he is the reason you are annoyed. You need to be compassionate towards that person.
Showing compassion in such times shows how much we have grown as an adult. Otherwise, you can always throw a tantrum like a 3-year old, if you want.
Showing compassion towards other attracts compassion from others. This can lead to a beautiful cycle of compassion.
5. Explain it to yourself:
Try to explain the situation you are in to yourself. Remember to describe the situation in third person.
Let’s say your name is John, a simple example can be. When John went to the office this morning, Andrew met and started talking about some dumb stuff that is annoying John. Now, John didn’t have his morning coffee, so, he’s a bit cranky.
This explanation of situation to yourself allows you to contemplate on the situation in a objective way. You essentially create a disconnect between you and ‘annoyed’ you that allows for a better analysis of the situation.
Creating a disconnect between you and your emotion is always a good way to overcome them.
6. Walk a meter in their shoes:
It comes right in the ballpark of compassion, though, but deserves a separate heading because it is really effective. Once, we understand the person in front of us, we are able to take better, informed actions and prevent potentially bridge-burning actions.
For example, if somebody is annoying you, let’s say Andrew. You can think that Andrew had a lonely weekend because all of the stupid stuff he’s been telling you doesn’t point to be the weekend of the year. He considers you his friend that is why he is telling you all of that stupid stuff. When you think like that, it’s really nice you have a person who considers you a friend at office.
7. This too shall pass:
One should always believe in the power of time when in situations like this. You just have to know that no matter, how hard it is right now. This situation won’t even exist after say, 10–20 minutes.
So, just relish in the temporariness of the situation you are in and wait.
8. What really matters:
You have to focus on what really matters. If you do something stupid now, it will affect the important tasks you had to do all day. Your focus should be on the prize and not the person annoying you.
9. Annoying people are abundant:
Yes, they are abundant as air. You can never ever be not annoyed. Your getting annoyed is inevitable.
It’s just like traffic, you wish you weren’t stuck in it but hey, you are stuck in traffic and reading this. Just like traffic can’t be avoided, same is the song with annoying people. Just like with traffic, you have come up with creative ways to keep your sanity intact like reading Medium blogs :) etc.. The same you need to do with annoying people.
10. Zone out:
You could always also zone out of the annoying conversation you have.
Like, I like to think about the cup of coffee I will have after this boring conversation, oh, yeah, the show I saw last night awesome, I forgot to do the dishes, shit, I really to need to write more on Medium, oh, yeah, I can make writing buddies that will motivate me, but, where to go find them, instead let’s write a new article on Medium, “How to make new friends?”, I really need a pizza also.
This mental journey is something you need to go on when are you are getting annoyed.
11. You are being WATCHED!:
This is just a trick to stop you from blasting on the person that is annoying you.
Pretend you are being watched, that kind of social pressure and the eyes you feel on yourself will stop you from doing potentially damaging behaviour.
When you are in public, you refrain from certain actions including acting out. So, it will a nice trick up your sleeve.
Lastly, if nothing works, then, just take out your HEADPHONES and block all the annoying things in the world. Just give yourself to the music!
❤ ❤ ❤